VENT

here's a few things that need to be said:

_work has been good to me. of course there were its moments when i dreaded it but usually at the end of my shifts i'm content. I figured if I'm going to end up doing something much similar to what I've been involved with, then I have to make the best of it. in the end, I love work. and most of all i love my co-workers.
_some people are selfish. They worry about themselves before the matter at hand... i love my grandma and she deserves the best. i'm glad she lives with my family instead of yours. you don't abandon people you love.
_got 3 of my grades, waiting on 2 more ... i passed the 2 that i was most worried about. the rest is cake =)
_Friends come and go, this year a lot of that has happened. May be unfortunate, may be a good thing, either way in the end... once a friend always a friend.

hello goodbye.

Last night I was at the airport because my boyfriend, his mom and his brothers were all heading to the Philippines for the holidays. Being there with him and his family was very comforting and to have seen him leave seriously felt like a big part of me left with him. He gave me the biggest hug and kiss goodbye. and all that just triggered my tears and the feeling of knowing that I'm going to miss him so much. I mean you'll think I'm crazy with the fact that he'll only be gone for a measly 12days, but to me that will feel like forever :\ I love him, and I know that he'll be ok. He gets to spend time with family over there and do all the fun stuff over there.

It's day #1 and I already miss his voice.
he left me a voicemail so that I'd be able to listen to it whenever I miss him, especially for during the time before i go to sleep.

He's amazing, loving, caring, and responsible. I wouldn't want to be with anyone else but him. Have a safe trip my love, I'll see you home soon!

<3 to <3

Falling in love with someone isn't always going to be easy... Anger... Tears... Laughter... it's when you want to be together despite it all. That's when you truly love each other.

you are better for me and I am better for you.

the feeling of not knowing...

...always gets to me.
How do I explain

another birthday year

Mondy Nov. 2: birthday dinner#1: boyfriend took me to Roy's Hawaiian Fusion at the GardenWalk in Anaheim. dinner was amazing and what was even more amazing was the cute surprise gift he bought for me. Hello Kitty ring from Zales :) he spoils me.

School week >__< was super stressful. homework due. quizzes/tests.

Friday Nov. 6: birthday dinner#2: had a kbbq dinner with a wonderful group of friends. highschool friends, sydt friends, APO bros, best friends, co-worker friends. It was wild at first. and I was a bit sad that I didn't get to eat much. to see people that i haven't seen in years was one of the most amazing encounters yet. because despite everything, they still came. i'm very fortunate to have people like them in my life...and that's what makes them golden.

Saturday Nov. 7: my 20th Birthday. DISNEYLAND for free...i could never pass that offer :) (thank you tinySMALLS for letting, bf, my sister and her bf in for free too). rode everything worth riding by 3pm. bf kicked my butt at Buzz Lightyear astroblasters AND ToyStory Midway Mania. got a little birthday treat from Kevin and Debbie. went home. napped for an hour. and then had birthday dinner at Lucille's with my family. now that made me STUFFED.

This was the best birthday celebration...to be honest...EVER... it was AMAZING.

halloween 2009 :)

Lady Gaga for the win :) Happy Halloween everyone! more pictures to come!

hiya!

=P self-defense is so fun and empowering. i like the idea of punching the shit outta my teacher!

I've been on a emotional roller coaster this past week and well what can i say? happens once a month definitely. DAMN womanhood. haha. I realized are emotions like these because of the moment or is it bottled up feelings that soon find their way out of me. either way it's good to be able to communicate. (sorry to the boyfriend especially). I wanted to take the time to recognize and thank the people who've been so understanding with me. Who've put up with my shit and who've helped me figure things out...

My Sisters: During a recent interview I had been asked "what inspires you?" and the first thing that came to mind was "my sisters"...she then asked me why...and so I answered: Both of my sisters inspire me to work hard and to want to achieve whatever it may be that makes me happy. They are unbelievably GENIUS in more ways than one. and to be honest, I don't know what life would be like without them.

Jerus: Lately this guy, has been so inspiring. To be able to understand and give amazing advice, is well...pretty much amazing. Believing in me helps me want to do better.

Jarek: Friend and co-worker, work is always fun when he's around. I admire it when people confide in me, because it makes me feel like I did something in order to gain that certain trust. He also give awesome advice about life and a different outlook on hardships, etc.

Big (Natasha): although we have our busy lives, we always still share that bond of understanding. and that humor of cute boys. you always know how to cheer me up, without even knowing it.

Jessika: haha she just freakin' goes through what I go through, and I love it. because at the end of the day I won't feel like I'm alone with girly emotions.

Lawrence Anthony Castro Mallari: OMG you are the most wonderful person in my life outside of my family. WHY? because with you i'm at my best. wanting to make the best, do the best, feel the best, not only for you and me but for my future. Knowing that you're by my side through everything is what keeps me strong. I thank God everyday for bring you to me, because finally for once, genuine happiness is possible. "You made a broken heart whole again" i'll never forget that. :) (i would write more, but you already know i'm absolutely head over heels for you)

...I'm still in search for that internship. or that window to opportunities to open. Lately after that last opportunity I felt a little bummed. but i'm accepting the fact that sometimes timing isn't right and that there will be more.

I'm planning to focus more on building up the relationship at home and strengthening the already established relationship i am in. Life's been TOO good to me. and I am absolutely THANKFUL.

so close, yet so far

...I hate that feeling of being an inch away to something you've been searching for and having to miss it because of other priorities...I guess the search continues on...

Recently I had declared my Major in Fashion Merchandising, and a Minor in Hospitality Food Service and Hotel Management. Weird combination right? well I did think about it for a while now, along with my other thoughts and ideas about what I wanted to be. Trying to find the right thing for me was so difficult. Inspiration from seeing people be in love with what they do makes me want to feel that same passion. So it begins. MetroPark...I love my job. I know there are days where I may absolutely hate it, but for the majority of time spent with that company and with the many co-workers I've met, I realized that I should do what I am interested in most. That's when I was certain that this major/minor is the route I want to take. The same day I declared my major, a fashion merchandising opportunity already appeared to me. And just yesterday the interview had arrived and she was explaining how she believes I would qualify best for this position. An hour after the interview she calls to schedule an appointment and I leaped for the chance, also at that moment I asked a few questions I was concerned about and it didn't hit me until I got off the phone. they were asking for 20hrs/week to do the un-paid internship. 20 HOURS?? realistically, looking at my schedule i can only offer about 10-12hrs :( because my school schedule is pretty much their work hours...this is one opportunity, and I'm sure I'll find another one. It's just a matter of time, and how much I'm willing to do ALL of this.

...searching once again.

western by kaylakayyy featuring Marc Jacobs bags

side note: I really want these Steve Madden Cognac boots...

http://www.zappos.com/steve-madden-brio-cognac-leather

the only one in charge...

..is yourself. mind over matter.

Watch your thoughts, for they become words.
Watch your words, for they become actions.
Watch your actions, for they become habits.
Watch your habits, for they become character.
Watch your character, for it becomes your destiny.

It's by choice, not chance to have ended up with everything I have now. I am lucky enough to have people who care about me, love me, help me, provide for me, guide me, teach me, etc. To think there are those who are less fortunate than I, saddens me because there are times when I feel like "my life sucks" when really I should be thankful. I should appreciate how much I am blessed with a lot of things...lately I just seem to overlook all of it.

A few days ago, I visited my friend in the hospital. We have so much history together. Holding a friendship with someone for almost 10 years isn't easy...but with her, it has always been successful. My heart broke seeing her in that state, having to watch her suffer through the pain, I couldn't help but break down into tears. She's such a strong person, I believe she will make it through all this. and yet...I can't help but pray that she'll get better sooner.

weekend recap...
Friday 9/25:
_went shopping in the morning with the sister.
_Omicron Pledge Class
_dinner at The Melting Pot :)
Saturday 9/26:
_work@MetroPark 2pm-6pm. (bf got to dj same shift)
_dinner at Cafe Opa for some authentic Greek food.
Today/Sunday 9/27:
_Church: no electricity...so the whole mass was celebrated in candlelight.
_2nd street w/ my sister. shopped at buffalo exchange. and i got myself a Hello Kitty wallet.

ramblings...
_i get irritated easily for certain situations.
_i hate headaches.
_“The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, known suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern. Beautiful people do not just happen."
_i want to cook a feast :)
_and...i really want to figure out my life already.

5 <3..and counting

:) so my wonderful bf had taken me out to this gorgeous quaint Italian restaurant called "Raffaello's Ristorante" for what was our 5month celebration. It was so cute walking into that place, welcomed with the aromas of Little Italy. The kind waiter escorted us to our table, grabbed me a napkin and placed it onto my lap. That kind of startled me at first because restaurants nowadays don't do that. The service was so interactive and friendly. I had ordered the Ravioli D'Aragosta (Ravioli stuffed with Lobster served in cream sauce) while the bf ordered Penne al Pesto de Pollo (Penne pasta in a basil pesto sauce, served with grilled chicken). Before dinner was served a nice couple had asked us if it was our first time eating there because it was their first time as well. They had also warned us that a lot of appetizers come out before the actual meal. They were sooo right. A basket of fresh bread, fresh bruchetta, and salad, all came out before we even got to eat the entree. It was sooo delicious. Then finally the main meal arrived and the presentation was amazing. The pesto sauce was mixed just right, and the combination of the lobster ravioli and the cream sauce went so well together. Once the meal was over, they provided a free scoop of some kind of Neapolitan ice cream, which finished off the meal perfectly. It was definitely one of those great experiences that will bring me back to that place soon. After dinner we went with my sister and he boyfriend to a dessert place called MILK in Los Angeles. I believe it's definitely worth the 20min drive to satisfy my sweet tooth :P

To the bf:
It's the simple things that make me happy. I don't need any fancy gifts, or to go on ridiculously expensive outings, to make me feel the way I do. happy i love you day x5.

so long sweet summer...

SUMMER 2009...my goodness, I had an amazing time :)

The first week of school already zoomed by but the weather these past few days have been horrible. I already knew I wasn't a fan of hot weather...I just want it to be winter already. My teachers have been decent, and so I have no complaints so far, not yet at least haha. Although my FAFSA check hasn't been mailed to me yet, so I'm trying to be patient with that one, but i need that ASAP. because books need to be bought so I can get started on all my homework assigned. I wanna be on top of my game this semester.

on a heavier note...
going back to school was exciting. but I think my excitement only included new classes, and a few people. things changed. Its difficult for me to explain. without being so worked up about it.

ramblings...
_I hate it when you try to be nice to a person and they disregard your effort because they can't seem to get over it. stop being so immature, grow up, and accept the way life happens.
_FAFSA is getting on my nerves...I'm hoping it comes in by friday or saturday..or else ::shakes fist:: haha
_from the looks of it..it's going to be an interesting semester. I can already see it now. long nights at the library. working 4-5 days in a row...oh boy.
_i'm in love with the iPhone :) it's an amazing investment.
_my boyfriend is one of the best things that has ever happened to me in...my life. how do i know this? well one would be smart enough to keep a person in their life who makes them happy ever since the day they met, who supports and protects, provides friendship, offers companionship...
it's quite rare to find someone like this...that's why I'd never want to let him go.
_I want a fishtank :P
_cleaned my room. but it needs some re-cleaning again..bahh i need a day off to do that haha.

excitement

summer vacation is slowly coming to an end and I am super satisfied. I've done more things I've ever done in my whole life in just a span of 2-3 months. Tomorrow is another adventure at Raging Waters. I can't even remember how long it has been since the last time I went. If I can recall I think it was over 10years ago? Wow, now I can't wait :) hot weather. water rides. uneven tans. good company. and good food.

Today I fortunately got to hangout with a few people I have not seen in a while. It was really nice to be able to enjoy their company over delicious GREEK food at this quaint little restaurant called Cafe Opa. Our conversations were amusing and its good to know that even though we've all been apart some people just never change :). It was fun to laugh at the past and the little stupid things here and there. Also hearing about each others news about school, friendships, love stories. haha such a good night. Tomorrow is going to be epic :)



Plakoti-Gyro with a side of Opa Fries
absolutely AMAZING.

rewind

this weekend had been a little hectic. but filled with a bunch of activities. let me break it down.
Friday 7/31: Justin/Sonny's Bonfire. it was chill. got to see a few AphiO people that i haven't seen in a while. so that was nice.
Saturday 8/1: short trip to costa mesa H&M. back to my place. and stopped by at Cabrillo Beach for some sandcrab hunting. then went to a place called Gaucho's Village Brazilian Churrascaria Steak House for Lawrence's cousins going away-to-med-school dinner. and it was ALL-YOU-CAN-EAT. these men come around with swords of meat, and you would answer with the flip of your coaster of "yes please" or "no thank you". it was delightful. and i left feeling as if i wouldn't be able to eat for days...
Sunday 8/2: woke up early as always for 7:30am church. Lawrence came along for the early mass experience at my church finally :P around 9ish we dropped my grandma off at this place in Melrose then we made our way to belmont pier. upon our arrival over there, the pier was CLOSED due to some taste of long beach event they had, so we had to drive all the way back to redondo, where we did get a good spot. but still caught nothing. Sunday was also david ho's birthday: HAPPY BIRTHDAY DHO. and so we "surprised" him with a small dinner and games at John's Incredible Pizza Co. which was once again another all-you-can-eat buffet of salads, pasta, pizza, and dessert. The games were fun. Lawrence and I ended up with like 679 tickets. but only used about 200 in selecting prizes. Got to drive his car home because he was too full. and called it a night.

ramblings...
-I haven't eaten this much since i don't even remember when.I mean food was delicious and all but damn..i feel super bloated. but its ok though because it's working out time since school is just around the corner.
-With school in mind, I can't believe how much tuition raised this semester. it's crazy expensive.
-Life is surely falling into place, in the way I wanted it to be. So I can't complain much. unless I complain about the simple things. which i will not do. because i am NOT a whiner :P
-my siberian husky needs her nails trimmed.
-my room is a MESS that needs some major fixing to do, just wish I had the money.
-work hasn't been giving me hours lately which sucks :\
-I wish I could go on vacation somewhere for like 3 days. Just to get away from the area.

if only...

you could throw your life into a big sifter and sift away the things in life that you don't need or don't find much importance in. Then ta da! you'll be happily left with everything that your heart desires. Unfortunately we aren't given that option. Instead we carefully have to hand select the good from the bad. But what happens when something you think is good, goes bad. Do you throw it back into the pile and choose another with hopes for something better? or keep what you got in hopes that with time it'll change. Its tough to want something, and then when you finally get it, something else has to come up to make everything seem incomplete once again. OR am I just overreacting...
I already understand that change is inevitable and that it only affects you if you allow it to get to you. but sometimes its the effort that a person may or may not exert that ruins friendships/relationships/etc. Learn to appreciate people.

July is coming to an end. and August is just around the corner.
what to look forward to:
birthdays friends&family
beach days
bbqs, bonfires.
theme parks
1 month of summer left
back to school shopping.

I'm happy and lucky to have everything I've got. just sometimes...












holding hands is overrated.
its all about holding feet :P
haha jk.
i love lawrence anthony

more that meets the eye

Retro1 by kaylakayyy featuring Ray

You might think that this set is quite odd looking. But I think that those shoes are just adorable :P

Its summer and unfortunately this past week I've been struck with the Flu. Until today I'm feeling much better. I didn't really have to lay in bed like a zombie and I was able to eat more than yesterday without feeling nauseated.

stop. hammer time.

"The deepest secret is that life is not a process of discovery, but a process of creation. You are not discovering yourself, but creating yourself anew. Seek therefore, not to find out Who You Are, but seek to determine Who You Want to Be."

Summer is definitely in the weather and its HOT. gives me this mixed love/hate feeling.

beach1 by kaylakayyy featuring Dorothy Perkins

trip to the beach anyone?

Ramblings:
_Roller coasters are fun. but not when your life seems like you're constantly on one.
_I wish I could go shopping :P
_Tomorrow is going to be a fun-filled day.
_I'm happy with my life for the most part.
_its just a few little things that can drag me down.
_finding who I want to be is a work in progress.
_I gotta take care of myself.
_Summer adventures are amazing.
_I hate when creeper old men stare at me.
_sometimes I wonder if I went to a school of arts or design. Would it be possible to make it in the Fashion world. That rush, and environment makes me happy.
_I'm feeling...restless.

i hate times when...

you put effort into something, and get NOTHING in return. So then you get to the point where you think "fuck, i'm over it".

Dark1 by kaylakayyy featuring French Connection accessories

happier note. this set is ugly. i'm not really into it right now...

some good things must come to an end

...summer school is winding down and tomorrow is the last day. I'm a little bummed because I've enjoyed this class so much. Makes me appreciate marine life so much more, and actually makes me want to visit so many areas where such animals live (tidepools, aquariums, etc.)

I guess since one thing ends, another good thing begins...for me...its SUMMER TIME. I can't wait to go body boarding, learn how to skim board, barbecues, bonfires, fishing, and a heck of a lot MORE. To think I had a blast even if I was in summer school, I can't imagine how much fun I'll have since I'll be out of summer school. Hopefully work gives me reasonable hours. :)

its not everyday...

...that you get surprised with tickets to SeaWorld :)...
I know this is all late because I went on June 19. but better late than never to share some fun times. I wanted to show a few pictures from the day the boyfriend surprised me with the actual ticket (June 16). and pictures from the day of.

_ Shamu showing off
_ A friendly dolphin who decided that it wanted to be in the spotlight.
_ One of my favorite marine animal. the Chambered Nautilus.

I had so much fun. I'm pretty sure my summer is going to be amazing!

July 1st

I can't believe the last time I blogged on this was back in May? and its already July now. Time seems to be passing quicker than I thought. but at least its all in good....i mean GREAT fun. Summer started off well even if I'm in summer school. I think summer school is what gave it a little kick in adventures with all the little field trips that came with it. Trips to the beach, dog park, Sea World, and all that good stuff has been quite amazing. I've done more in these past 3 months than I've ever done in my life. and to think that this is only the beginning.

Happiness comes if you allow it to.
_My family is getting closer in ways of more support, friendship, and love.
_Friends...to be honest we drifted apart. BUT it has its days when we can all simply reunite and seem as if nothing has ever changed. that's what I love most about them.
_Lawrence, what can I say. He's a real big reason why everything is so perfect, or what seems to be close to perfect.

Summer school is going to be over next week. so I'm pretty sure the fun will kick in x100. Everything is falling into place. Never have I imagined it to be this way. but I'm definitely glad things happen.

all i really need to say is that...

...I have an amazing boyfriend.

so long school, hello summer!

so my summer had jumped off to an amazing start. work has been giving me more hours. time with friends and boyfriend are getting better. and RHO GAMMA placed 2ND in the fraternity's dance competition:

i AM SO HAPPY right now like it's unbelievable. but yet everything is real and all happening to ME :) aren't i lucky. well to start the summer off i'm supposedly going to the beach today if the weather is nice. i'm starting to work on getting fit again. because i know this past semester, i've let myself go :( which is not a good thing. but summer gives me the opportunity to get into shape! okay well i'm off to start my day. since it's summer time, i believe i'll have more of a chance to blog more often! <3>

fcuk finals

1 down 2 more to go.

I can't wait for the summer. and I know I keep repeating it over and over again. but i really can't wait. my life has seem to fallen in place for the most part. I'm going to take care of myself for those around me that I love and care for.

this goes out to you...

I LOVE YOU MOM.
I would like to say how wonderful my mother is. Whether if she's super naggy, strict, or over-dramatic. I love her with my whole heart. We all wouldn't be this gorgeous without her (and I guess my dad too haha).

I'm having a really good day, besides the headaches. I was lucky enough to spend time with my family and Lawrence. what more could I ask for? absolutely nothing at all =)
This week is going to be insane with Finals coming up next week. I can't wait for summer, and summer school, and all the fun adventures such as camping, road trips, possible trip to New York (?). Then again I wouldn't mind picking up more hours at work. I need to start getting serious about life and the little issues here and there.

as finals are just around the corner

It's time to bust out the late night studying and early morning wake-ups. coffee/tea and treats will suffice as mere study aids during this process.

I can't wait for SUMMER :) oh the days of fun are drawing near.

hello kitty

I was online looking for a gift a few minutes ago, and I came across this Hello Kitty ring that's part of ZALES HK collection and I found it to be incredibly adorable and might I add that I think the ring is only available in my size or what I think is my size haha but then again this gift search isn't for me, so it'll have to wait. I just wanted to take some time to share how much I admired it :P haha.

Ok back to more important stuff.
Lately I feel as if I haven't done enough or as if I wasn't good enough with certain things. A lot of mixed emotions run through my mind. but I don't know how to grasp them individually. Or if I even want to make sense of it all. What I do know is that I am going to have to not worry about everyone/everything else around me and just do what I have to do for myself in order to get by. I do however have those certain people in my life that I can definitely turn to for times of need. I've come to learn and accept that throughout life you're going to lose a lot, but at the same time you gain a lot and when it comes down to it, you end up in a better place than you were once in. I know I've grown a lot since last year. My opinions, thoughts, and ideas have expanded much more and now life seems to make much more sense. I'm glad I can say that I was once in the dark and that I was able to pick myself up again.

I am happy with the new friends I have made (who by the way I appreciate so dearly) and for the supportive family I've always had but ceased to turn to. I've made my share of mistakes and regrets but damn...at this moment I don't really care much because despite all that I can say that I am really happy now. and from the looks of it I'm going to be this way for a while.

“But there is suffering in life..."

"...and there are defeats. No one can avoid them. But it's better to lose some of the battles in the struggles for your dreams than to be defeated without ever knowing what you're fighting for."

I've blown over the small unnecessary things but then when it all comes down to it, things just build up and soon enough are bound to explode. I hate being looked down upon or feeling less of myself. I'm upset, maybe a little angry at certain issues. but at this point there's nothing I can do or say to change things. and from the looks of things, I don't want to change or fix it. It is what it is.

words cannot express.

how much better life is. A lot has changed and I can say, bad things happen so that better things can come along and sweep you off your feet. I've been a terrible blogger over the span of a month or 2. That means details need to be discussed.

School: has been kicking my butt. It's getting tough as I am only getting lazy. I know the mentality needs to change soon before the semester ends so that I can figure out what it is I really want to end up doing. Balancing between the Fraternity and School, is hard for me because I haven't been managing my time very well. Focus more on school, Less on the other things.

Life: Surely has been better. The friends and the family issues have subsided and the true ones are revealed. I think it's about time that people deserve to be happy. Starting with those around me. I still need to figure out what it is that I need to do, in order to get things straight. A lot of things have seem to become more stable and for that, It is time for me to grow up and take charge of things in order for it to work out in the end. 

"As I cross my fingers, I pray to God and hope that this time things will be better."

+Camping w/APO: April 24, 25, 26: Service with the Boy Scouts of America was fun here and there. 

+Korean Bbq w/ my G6, G5 and my Lil. was amazing. I didn't think we could bond so quickly, but we really did.

+I'm planning to bake/cook more.

i'm sorry blogger

...if i have abandoned you. it was never my intention, I've just been having too much fun lately :)
Last night was our 1st annual Spring Charity Event for Alpha Phi Omega. The show was amazing and things turned out for the better. As for now, I can't wait for the day to get started. A day in LA with some great people. Adventure time! Can't wait.

=)

i'm all smiles. this was one of the best spring break ever, and i feel really stupid,because at the moment i'm pretty much smiling at my computer

SPRING BREAK '09

has been amazing so far.

March 26: Thursday: So I got out of class at about 12:15 and I spent some time soaking in the fact that I was officially on spring break. To begin Spring Break 2009 the right way. Lawrence and I took a trip to LA to visit Jessika at her home. She took us around to see old town Pasadena, her work, Glendale, eagle rock, and then we went back to her place and they jammed on the guitar and such.

March 27: Happy birthday Clarice Angeli Guico! I LOVE YOU! my bestest friend in the whole world turned 20 today :) Although I didn't do much today, I ended up eating at boiling crab for the first time of my life for Melanie's Birthday dinner. Shrimp was deeeelicious but i am damn sure all that was suuuper unhealthy :) heck you only live once.

March 28: Work was a bust. I worked a 7hr shift that took up my whole day. at least I made some money right? After work Lawrence came over to Carson area and we ate dinner at BJs. then when we got back to my house he got to meet my mother.

March 29: My morning started off horribly. Mother was being moody. I was just tired. But I took some time to tidy up here an there. Finally I was set free and Rence took me to Frosted to get a cupcake :) then we got to watch The Haunting in Connecticut. Which I must admit, it got me jumping. After we went to Guppies. and boy was that an interestin night. Despite the stupid people, I got to see Gail after how long.

March 30: Lawrence bought lunch and we got to watch my favorite filipino movie with his grandmas :) then we went and helped diana with some boxes because she's moving out of her apartment. spent rest of the day in Buena Park. went to 3 places just to find Ben & Jerry's Chunky Monkey just because I wanted some. then Jessika came from LA. ate sushi at midori. listened to them play the guitar and then I decided to just play Gears of War 2.

TODAY: The weather was beautiful. I woke up at about 6am to start my day. I met my Lil up at Westgate park and we played tennis for about 2 hours. It was intense, well for me at least. I'm proud to say that I am somewhat getting better and soon enough I will be more challenging for my lil haha. Then I met up with a pledges for interviews. at about 2pm it was time to hit the beach w/ Jessika and Lawrence. The weather was amazing. Windy but very nice. I got to drive the truck back to long beach. and had a wonderful dinner date of pizza and ice cream while watching the view from signal hill with Jessika. and now I'm home. early for once which my mom likes to see from time to time. as for the rest of the night I am going to bask in the many episodes of shows I've missed throughout the week. toodles til next time :)

SORRY...

after starting this blog I had been consistent with blogging EVERYDAY...as of now I had broken the chain of constant blogging-ness. Glad to say that there are reasons as to why I haven't been able to blog as much as I have before. School, Alpha Phi Omega, and friends have taken up my time. But thing is maybe it is a good idea to hold off on blogging everyday so that my blogs will hold more interesting stories and what not as the days go by.

I am going to keep...

"...the promises I've made to you, just please understand and give me the time. It will be worth the wait."

When they say that the best thing for you is usually there right in front of you without knowing it. and until that day comes and it is somewhat a slap to the face when you realize, why didn't you know about it sooner. In this case it's better late than never. I don't want to have it any other way. But in order for things to work the way we plan, time and communication is more important than ever at this moment.

Today was by far one of my favorite days this year <3

He's just not that into You..

...was a good movie...thank you for taking me to see it last night :) The movie was pretty accurate on so many different levels. It was very entertaining, and would like to recommend people to watch it when you have spare time. I had just arrived home from a wonderful day at Six Flags spent with my friends. X2 and Tatsu are my favorite rollercoasters ever! I can't even completely express how thrilling those two were just so amazing. I am tired and I have church in the morning so I'm calling it a night.

birthday dinner galore!

home.
clean car.
errands.
project linus@1pm
work@3pm-7pm
Clarice&Dari's Bday Dinner: Hokkaido@7:30pm
late night affairs :)

I'm excited for the day!

cough drops, tissue, robitussen, dayquil/nyquil,

has been my best friends for the past week and because of them, I've soon been able to recover quicker. medicines can't cure the heart but care, comfort, and happiness can. it is the remedy. something that I've had for a long time but just haven't been able to grasp...its about time...

you and i will have our own history

in due time =) I want to see where this goes.
School has really been kicking my ass lately and I'm starting to lose my motivation or drive to want to succeed. But I think that's only the case because I haven't decided what is it exactly that I want to be when I'm older. To be honest the Navy Reserves still seems promising but I fear a lot that may come with it. There's no doubt that I
I am almost 100% recovered from this virus/flu/cold/whatever it may be, minus a few sniffles and coughs here and there. What I am most happy for is that I got my voice back because I can actually sing obnoxiously in my car again!
I'm babbling :) have a wonderful day!

Happy St. Patricks Day!

In honor of today with the help of my sister we prepared green-velvet cupcakes (same ingredients as red velvet :P) Today was long as usual, since Tuesdays are my longest days during the week. School. Meeting@pm. Active Meeting@7pm. and then Pledge Exhibition after.

This pledge class is going to do big things, I can see it coming =)

you want to believe

that whatever the world has to say doesn't matter, but deep down inside it means a lot and it affects things. but I think I've gotten to that point of not caring much about it anymore. It is just words of criticism, judgment, and possible jealousy in which people tend to use in order to bring down a person's image. That is when, as a person you should rise and stand up against all odds hoping that decisions you make along the way are the right ones. You tend to win some and lose some. It is a cycle we all have to go through one way or another. This is my life and my choices, why do you have to worry so much about me and other peoples' business when you have your own issues to worry about. Tend to your own and keep it that way. I hate all this talking, you're only making the person you are talking about more famous than he/she already has to be by the minute you open your mouths. But I must admit, I like being able to hear the things people have to say, these days...quite amusing.

let's make it clear

that things will me alright. This weekend had by far been one of those good weekends. I didn't have to worry much about anything really. Work had been good to me. At the meeting this morning they voted me best dressed for the day so I have a chance to win a $50 gift card for MetroPark which would be awesome so I can get a pair of jeans for cheaper! :P The bonfire went well, I was able to make and eat two smores, I also watched The Dark Knight for the first time on saturday night, and to be honest I actually liked the movie. Although it was long the story was good. I love Heath Ledger. Ok i'm done with Chemistry homework, so now I wanna get some rest..sad to say...I AM STILL SICK.

hazy and lazy

the weather seems gloomy today, I like it :P but that's just me. Today I have work 1pm-6pm(8) but I'm hoping that they don't use my on-call because I have plans tonight. After work I'm planning to attend APO Interchapter Event which is a bonfire at Huntington Beach then when that's over, watch movies with rence at his house. Sounds like a plan.

grrreeaaat.

this morning I had my second exam for chemistry and it was...oh so stressful. As I was taking it, I felt suuupeer uneasy but I'm hoping a miracle happens. I lazily came to school in sweatpants and a sweatshirt which isn't my usual attire but it was sure comfortable :) as for today I'm going to sit back and relax. maybe even play some piano here and there. then I have work at 5pm-10pm. hopefully the day brings me happiness and relief.

and it still keeps going.

i'm sooo over being sick. boooo life.

sickness continues

I woke up feeling unbelievably terrible to the point that I missed school for the day. But in the end I had to go to school anyways to book a room for a fellowship event that I will be hosting in April. After that I decided since I am there anyways, I might as well stay and head my committee meeting, which was quite productive. Greek food, and Pinkberry, then studying after was not productive.

that feeling of sickness coming

CAME. because I am now officially sick :(
I just didn't think I'd get sick in a matter of hours. But I guess that's how it works. My head hurts, my throat hurts, and I am feeling like mush. time to just fall asleep in my car. since the day is going to be a looong one.

just WOW!

who could have thought so many ideas, thoughts, and emotions can be revealed in one day. ONE DAY. although a majority has probably progressed with more frustration and anxiety over time, today it seems as if things just blew up. I am tired. physically, emotionally, and mentally. I know things like this happen but I want to know WHY it happens. I want to know the answers to all these damn questions in my head. I am upset and on top of all this...I think I am getting sick :(

sunday funday

:) was fun. but exhausting.
I got to hangout with Lawrence and we went to the Native American Pow Wow on campus.
Ate lunch at Niko Niko with Jessika.
Had Dance Comp Practice at 3pm.
then Executive Committee Meeting at 5pm.

Lately things have been looking better, but with the good somehow some way there's always the bad. Well for me at least once in a while. Sometimes just for once, I just wish to be completely happy.

watchmen

what a day. morning errands were done. relaxed. and work was at 6pm-10pm. I met up with lawrence and we checked out the O-bar, didn't like the atmosphere yet, so then we decided to catch a movie at cerritos mall. I really wanted to watch "He's just not that into you" but we missed the showtime and so we ended up watching "Watchmen" which turned out to be a very VERY interesting movie. What I am most excited for is to watch Angels and Demons which comes out sometime in May. The previous someone illustrated what I would have imagined it to look like as I read the book. I am excited. but as for now I am exhausted.

Today:
Rabbit Rescue Service
Work.
home: homework&sleep

Tomorrow we change our clocks. damn to losing an hour of sleep :(.

let's get down to business

I want to know what I want and everything that comes along with it. To think things can happen in an instant and all of a sudden BAM change is initiated. Good/Bad either one, we learn to just deal with it, and move on. I've grown accustomed to change, because change is inevitable.

time

is of the essence.
yet it helps make sense of things.

CSULB vs. USC: Volleyball Game #1

One hell of a game :)

I had a good day today. Although I arrived late to school I still made it to my 8am class! My work didn't need to use my on-call today. I had pad thai tofu for the first time at Bai-Plu. Then watched the CSULB vs. USC men's volleyball game. Which by the way was intense! Unfortunately CSULB lost but the effort was amazing. After that the day ended well. Tomorrow should be busy but very interesting!

Work 8am-11am.
School.
Meeting with Brett.
Dance Comp Practice @5pm
Kappa Psi Epsilon: Open Mic Night @ 7pm

busy-bee.

Tuesday's are the long days.
Being on campus from 7:30am-10pm is exhausting but well worth it :)
School/Class. Meeting #1 @5pm. Meetings #2 @7pm.
That's how it goes but with more fun here and there.

Update on my Filipino Teleseries, I love love love it!
no matter how corny or lame it may be it still makes me feel all giddy inside haha

gone in 60 seconds.

why I titled it that? I don't know :P
monday was good.
LCG <3
this week is going to be dandy!
or what I hope is going to be good!

welcome March 2009

tonight was unordinary and different from every other night. might i add it was unexpected as well. but on top of all that, I enjoyed every moment of it. From getting out of work early, to dinner (sushi :P), to midnight madness in Irvine, to having to drive my friends' truck because they had been drinking, to getting home safely. Despite the fact that I have to wake up for church in about 4 hours, it's rare to have moments like these happen in my life. I cherish it all.


And then some...11:18pm...
Falling asleep to the sound of someone playing the ukelele is the best. In addition waking up this morning was very interesting. Dance comp was tiring but fun, broke a sweat hahahaha Excom Meeting was delightful. Being at the library with Jessika and Lawrence while being able to finish my Chemistry homework was very productive. Conversations and our breather was quite relaxing. In the meantime I am happy :)

work finally.

after how long?
Work better be busy
Tonight is exciting.
Goodbye February. Hello March.

friday

:) Day 3: No Meat.
APO Special Event.
Rho Rho Talent Show.
Burger King.
home late. worth it all.

straight bangs

make me look as if I just got off a plane from japan. someone also said I look like I am wearing a wig. grreeaat. haha the look is surely different, but there are moments when I like it, then moments when I feel disgusted looking at myself.

Today was interesting.
-School.
-Study.
-Class.
-Haircut.
-IC Event: Sprinkles in Newport Beach.
-CSULB vs. UCI bball game...GO LONG BEACH! we won!
-chill.

Now tomorrow is another day, should be interesting, I hope :)
School. Pick up check. Errands. Home. Get Ready. Alpha Phi Omega Special Event. UCI:Rho Rho Talent Show. out&about :)

Ash Wednesday

Sadly I was not able to receive ashes on my forehead this year. I was going to attend the Service at school but unfortunately I had class and I couldn't ditch it because of the fact that I had a Midterm to take. Alas I am finally free for the next few weeks til the next set of midterms.

Lenten Sacrifices:
No more Shopping for unnecessary things.
No more meat :(
(I'm thinking of one more worthy thing to give up)

twenty-four

Mardi Gras = Fat Tuesday
Breakfast: Tomato, Avocado, Mozzarella Omelet w/hash browns
Lunch: 1 and 1/2 Crunchwrap Supreme from Taco Bell.
Dinner: Baja Fresh: Burrito Ultimo in Enchilada sauce.

I am stuffed.

I'm sorry I've been too busy to blog, I am in the middle of Midterms week and it is definitely killing me.
Time for another sleepless night. toodles

2 Midterms tomorrow :( boo life.

blood drive

Today was the second time I was able to donate blood. I know how much my pint of blood can help save lives, and so that's why I did it. Despite the fact that I already knew it was going to hurt like no other again. It hurt more this time than last time. Other than that, today was somewhat productive. I got some studying done in the library, but unfortunately its not over, the night is still young and geography is going to be my enemy. goodnight.

Happy Birthday Dad!

Thank you for the trip to New York. It was fun. I loved the experience of the city. Despite all its hustle and bustle the environment is different and fast paced. Soon I will come back to New York. homework time.

...new york nights

:) amazing. delightful. stuffing.

gone

for NEW YORK
February 20-22.

see ya later Californians.

twisted

A LOT ran through my mind today.
School was eh.
Buffalo Exchange is the best.
Got my work schedule for next week.
Bought sunglass. electric blue.
Game Night Rush Event tonight was amazing :)
I had a lot of fun even if the room was confined.
yay, NEW YORK this weekend! can't wait.

here comes the sun

after days of non-stop rain the sun decided to come out and play today. Unfortunately I will most likely be indoors today working on plans for the upcoming months. This weekend I am going to New York for my dad's birthday which is also to visit my sister. I'm excited to see the city at an age in which I know I would appreciate it more. I also want to be able to dress all warm and fashionable with my sisters. Even though I'll only be spending about 1 day/night there, I am happy that I get to see my sister. I see her through videochat but its not the same. Today and Tomorrow I will be searching for Boots in which I can wear comfortably on my trip. Leather preferred, maybe a small heel? Since I haven't made an outfit I took the time to put together this outfit. It has that cool crisp look. I think the blue gives that affect on me.


Boho3 - by kaylakayyy on Polyvore.com

I've been downloading super Old School music and it makes me reminisce about the days when music was GOOD.
have a wonderful Wednesday

Tonight: Shopping w/ jessika. heart2heart. Rush Event. Phil's Birthday Dinner :)
HAPPY BIRTHDAY PHIL!!

wow wow wee

:) today was very...different. this is how it went:
_Grandma knocks on my door asking "what time are you waking up" and so I go back to sleep waiting for my alarm to wake me up naturally
_I noticed how good my sleep was and then I checked the time and it was 7:40AM meaning I had to make it to school in less than 20min for my 8AM Lab.
_Thank goodness Clarice motivated me to go and attend so I made it by 8:45AM. Luckily we had a substitute and he was more than happy to let me come late.
_I left to go home because I was horribly dressed in my sweatpants, CSULB sweater (covered in fur) and my Nike Frees.
_At home I changed. baked blueberry muffins and then headed back to school.
_Stayed at the Library for a couple of hours.
_Hungout with Brent (HUBBY).
_Special Events meeting @5pm
_General Body Meeting @7pm

Long day. It was hailing on the drive to school this morning. I am tired. Tomorrow should be fun :)

lately

I've felt uninspired to blog.
_Happy Birthday Joseph.
_Rain today was unbelievably insane.
_it flowed rivers/waterfalls down stairs.
_socks and shoes were soaked.
_went to all 3 classes.
_worked 3pm-7:15pm
_feet were killing me being in heels for about 7-8hrs straight.
_relaxed at home.

Tomorrow is Tuesday, my busiest day of the week :P
I have to start packing things for this weekend. and I am in need of some boots or something.and some warm accessories. :) yay for NEW YORK.

I am still craving French Toast.

step back

and look at what you've accomplished til this day. In one way or the other, I've made a huge change in myself and in others lives I hope. It is the little things in life that I've learned to appreciate most. After feeling as if I've already been in the position in which the world hated me and things would always go wrong, I've come to believe that I've overcame all of that. I'm tired. Sleep sounds good right about now.

Valentine's Day 2009

was a decent day. I didn't mind not being with anyone specific because I had dinner with the three most amazing guys in my life. Sushi and the company of friends makes me happy. This morning we made valentines day cards for those who live in a convalescent home. Then ate McDonadls 10pc chicken nuggets with large fries and a drink. Worked from 1pm-6pm. and then had dinner with Allan, Roland, and Jason at I <3>

Rush Event #3:

was pretty funny. especially the body-part musical chairs. The amount of rushees attending events aren't high but the people are surely worth it. its about quality not quantity.

Today:
Chemistry Test.
Hungout with Lil, Phillip, Clarice.
Cerritos Mall- pick up check
Korean Bbq
School: napped.
lil left.
napped some more.
Speed Dating

Rush Event #2:

was very fun :)

Today:
Study.
School.
Tennis.
Capture the Flag.
Tennis.
STUDY CHEMISTRY

too tired. and too much to do. I'll blog more tomorrow.
wish me luck!

beat your heart out

Woke up at 4am to work on homework. School went by quick today. Work used my on-call from 3pm-6pm. I got stuck in traffic for a horrible hour. Dinner was simple. Slice of chocolate cake made me happy. Ugly Betty and Grey's Anatomy episodes 13 are awesome. Filipino Tele-series are my favorite. Tomorrow is going to be an interesting and active day. Tennis, Capture the Flag :) yay! now some alone time with...Chemistry

Rush Event #1:

Info Night!
Very informative, there was a good turnout on Rushees who attended. I also think things went somewhat smoothly minus the technical difficulties, but overall we worked amazingly with whatever we had. I am hoping the rest of this week, gets better each day. School was fun today. Well Lab with clarice was hilarious. and being home alone in the afternoon is quite peaceful :) time for some homework. toodles

video blog failed :P

hahaha so I think yesterdays' video blog will be my last one. Due to some complaints haha jk i'm just going to hold off on those til I get familiar with how to convey information without being boring or some sort. Today's rainfall was amazing :) I can't seem to express how much I just love it when the rain pours. Rain seems like a cleansing of the earth in which everything is washed and is left clean and refreshed. Enough about rain, and more about me :) Lately I've been more happy, down to earth, and more determined to do better in what has been given to me. With Alpha Phi Omega, I've been devoting a good amount of time to the position I hold in order to make sure that during my term I did the best I could do and so that one day someone can say "I remember that one fellowship Kayla did..." As for friends, all I can really say is that we are all BUSY doing our own thing. A lot of us have our own tasks to carry out and so sometimes we are so focused on one thing more than the other. Yet somehow, some way we are able to settle down for even at least a few minutes to an hour to just catch up on how the other is doing. I like that. I like being able to go to my best friends. no matter how long we haven't spoken, and to be able to just talk as if nothing changed. For my family, I know times are tough, and we learn to work together in order to help one another. I love how close we are even if we tend to always seem annoyed or upset. I must admit as much as I think my mother is annoying, I love her to death :P

Navy Update: It is still in my thoughts. The idea of leaving and going away is exciting, but at the same time I fear the things that I cannot experience until I actually go. Such as boot camp, basic training etc. I know I'm a baby and I would probably have constant emotional breakdowns, but I need that push to be able to live a life that is unordinary and honorable. If I were to change the world, joining would definitely be a good start.

I'm done with school for the day. and I have Soup Kitchen Volunteering tonight from 5:00pm-7:30pm, I'm pretty excited. It's going to be monday #2 in a row! Rush week starts on Tuesday! I'm SUPER EXCITED.
[vgy y ji ft] <- Clarice messing with my keyboard as she sits next to me in Psychology class.

vlog #1

:)

trial&error

funerals.

attending two funerals in one day is so harsh on the heart...
I can't imagine it is the 6th death this year :( and it is barely february. I'm hoping to God nothing else bad happens. The funerals were sad but I'm glad I got to see my god-mother, and old friends.

Work today was alright. Pretty busy for a Saturday night but productive at least :) I decided to wear my 4.5in heels and I survived 3hrs in them, then decided to switch into my sandals for the last hour of closing. It wasn't too bad even if my feet felt like they were going to fall off.

After work Allan and I decided to grab some dinner at Bjs and I didn't eat as much when I felt like I could've eaten a cow. I ended up ordering a turkey sandwich and allan ordered nachos (btw one of my absolute favs from there). We didn't finish either so I packed up the sandwich and gave it to him, as I picked at the leftover soggy nachos. We then headed over to S&G's Starbucks and had a chat over some hot chamomile tea for me and a iced black tea strawberry for allan. I must say, it was pretty freezing outside, but having the hot cup of tea in my hand felt amazing. The drive home wasn't too bad. I obnoxiously screamed at the top of my lungs to songs by Kelly Clarkson :)
goodnight. I'm pooped.

blurb #1

have you ever sneezed while driving and as every normal person would do, you'd close your eyes in the moment of your sneeze. So do you ever stop to think that something could happen within that second of your eyes being closed? especially if it was a big sneeze. haha it's a random thought.

Today was pretty chill. I had a meeting this morning to become certified to book rooms for Alpha Phi Omega events. Then after I got home and was able to take my sister to the long beach port for her 3-day cruise to Ensenada. After all that I headed over to Roland's house and we watched my Filipino Dramas then I knocked out on the couch :P til about 4ish. That was when we decided to head over to Allans house. but once we got there we had to leave because Roland and I had to go welcome Rose back from her Kairos retreat at St. Josephs. Going back there brought me back to a lot of high school memories from the past. We all then went to eat at Gerry's Grill after which was pretty bomb filipino food but I seem to like homecooked filipino food better :) after saying by to Rolands family. Allan, Roland, and I walked over to this place called Pastries & Cafe. They had some bomb ass filled croissants. Then we stood outside in the rain for the longest time. I wish I brought my umbrella :\.

Rain is my favorite. Makes me Happy.

this semester...

barely started and it's already killing me. I've been super exhausted. Although I've been more physically active due to tennis and the other sports we play. Today it rained. and the bad news was that there were 2 viewings to attend to today. that is TWO different deaths. counting as number 5/6th time someone died this year. and it's only February. I fear something bad is going to happen this year but I hope to God nothing will.

SHOOTOUT2009

was amazing.
The point of the event was to score a lot of points depending on the designated areas on the court to shoot from in only 30 seconds. For the womens I got to play with Kim, and we made it to second round but lost. and for the co-ed team, I played with my Lil but we didn't score anything. Despite the losing streak, it was really fun to be able to hangout with people I care about. So far Week of Welcome and passing out flyers to join AlphaPhiOmega is stressful but it's getting the job done so I'm hoping we receive a good turn out this semester.

Nowadays Life seems more simple and relaxed. School is going to get tougher in a couple of days, but I'm handling. I wanna make sure everything I plan while being on excom will be memorable in one way or another. I believe it is time for me to say goodnight :)

high heels.

Boho2 - by kaylakayyy on Polyvore.com

I bought the shoes I've been wanting all weekend, which is the picture included in my ensemble I put together up there. It cost me $30 from target, which is a good deal, because I was going to spend $60+ at either Aldo or Cathy Jean. and so half the price and the similar look won my vote. but damn they are 4.5in high. I love how comfortable they are but I am a little hesitant wearing them out. I like loud articles of clothing that makes a statement that you have a sense of being different through style. At first these shoes used to bother me. But as time passed I've learned to like them much better.

Today was fun. School was its usual educational self. Allan and Roland came to visit and Allan was nice enough to buy us lunch from the Loft. (Thank you and sorry for the hassle). My favorite part of the day was TENNIS not only with my Lil but with other APO bros too. I'm glad everyone came out to play and added a little physical fitness to their daily life. GBM was very inspiring and I am so unbelievably thankful for all the people present in my life. I'm just having too good of a day :) I'm all in a good mood today and watch, tomorrow ends up crappy. haha I'll laugh hysterically.

happy ME!

I had a good day. hopefully it'll be a good week. I attended Soup Kitchen today at the Long Beach rescue Mission and I have to admit, it is now one of my favorite services. Just to see the smiles in those people's faces made me happy to know that they were able to receive a good warm meal for the night.

As a healthy treat I randomly grabbed some Vine Sweet Mini Peppers and Italian vinaigrette from Costco, and munched on them while watching Gossip Girls and One Tree Hill. Those peppers are NOT spicy at all and has a sweet fresh flavor.

Tomorrow I am excited for Tennis. and Meeting :)

fabulous february :)

you better be a good month!
Things have been incredibly chaotic right now, but I am going to just keep pushing in the same direction regardless. And in order to deal with massive amounts of confusion, because I can't hold out forever, my solution is, I'm going try to find some stability in my life.

I must admit, my yahoo horoscopes have been inspiring lately...
"Dating is like mining for valuables on a beach -- you sift through lots of sand before you get to the good stuff. And that's just how it is. Use these opportunities to refine your qualifications. Are you really seeking and meeting people who fit your ideal?"


Diva2 - by kaylakayyy on Polyvore.com

This outfit is one of my favorites because, BLUE so happens to be my favorite color. and the vibrant color makes the black and gray more appealing to the eye. The tights, have a jean material look to it, when it is really made out of spandex. And isn't that panda necklace adorable? :)

Day off today. Excomm Meeting at 5pm. I have some REALLY good events to plan, so it should be an exciting semester. Just wait and see!

end of january

It has been a tough month. but I am surely excited for February, it's going to be an interesting one.
Work today 3-6(9)pm. then freetime with friendsies.

one of those lazy days.

Once again, I woke up later than expected and so I got to school at about 15min before class started. Luckily I made it on time although I was most likely out of breath when I walked through the door. Then after class ended and since it was only 50min long it was only 8:50am which is too early to do anything. So I decided to hangout with those who either had a class at 10am or 11am. After everyone left I walked back to my car and headed over to the bank. I was glad I got to deposit all my money not including the check I got today so it'll even be more. Eastside Mario's was pretty good and so once we got back, it was nap time for me til 4pm. Work came along at 5pm and I got to work with my favorite people. btw JROCK!! you are my favorite co-worker :) They used my oncall so i worked til 10pm and met up with randy and roland at wing-stop. Once we got back to Allans, fresh baked mini chocolate-chip cookies were delicious.

Driving home tonight was a challenge only because I would stare into space or I was just exhausted. solution to that is...sleep :) goodnight

dear thursday,

you were fun :)

brownies for breakfast. class. pick up work schedule. dinner w/ allan and roland. tennis w/ lil.
good day. so goodnight.

cooking mama

...isn't a fitting name for me, but it is an addicting game. I baked brownies but I added too much chocolate chips and so it was very moist and wet in some areas of the batch. Hope my lil likes them.

Today was a relaxing day. I went to my classes. and then played pool with jerus, bryant, and my lil. Because I was paired up with my lil, We won! After all that Lil and I stayed at the union a little longer and chatted about a bunch of stuff. at about 7ish we then headed toward the parking structure to go home.

Tomorrow one class :) chill day.

first APO meeting of the year

was very successful, the room was full with almost everyone.
This morning I woke up at 5am and snoozed my alarm twice until actually getting up. I got up, got ready and at around 6am I prepared a cup of Mango Black Tea, that was very delicious and complimenting to the cold weather. When I got to school I was able to walk to the union before class with John and Clarice. and then Clarice and I headed over to our Chemistry lab which only lasted about 30minutes max. I killed the rest of my time til my 11am class at the union just talking and watching the last episode of my Filipino drams with Jessika :). At 11am I was super hesitant to go to my Geography class because I didn't know anyone taking it, but luckily I bumped into someone I knew from last semester's English class. After class I spent even more time at the union waiting for my Lil to get outta class. At around 3pm my lil and I got to play tennis at the newly built tennis courts at school and they are super nice. Made me want to play competitively again. Unfortunately tomorrow I'll probably be sore as hell but it's well worth it. KFC with my big&lil was good. Meeting was interesting. Me? I'm tired and exhausted.

Tomorrow is going to be another loooonnnngggg day. fudge.
Chem 8-8:50 Math 9:30-10:45 Psych 12:30-1:45

springsemester

1st day of the semester wasn't too bad.
My teachers are all very interesting and I've enjoyed the classes so far.
Chemistry. Math. Psychology

I'm tired and exhausted.
school tomorrow.
Chemistry Lab. Geography. Tennis. Aphio

resistance.

I'm trying to resist the urge to want to make things better. But the matter is not in my hands. I've done all that I could do. I just wished for a better outcome. I will be honest with myself and everyone else. I miss him. I miss the laughter. His company during either breakfast/lunch/dinner or even just being around him. But most of all I miss the friendship. Being able to know someone like him is there, to call when I feel like crap or to vent about how stupid things are from time to time. I know there are those who I can turn to for all that. but he was a big part of my life that I barely got to grasp a connection with. Despite the issues that came up, it was something that I was willing to work around to make at least just a friendship work. I hope to get over all of this one day, but to think that throwing away what could have been one of those life-long friendships would haunt me for days, months, or even years to come. You don't meet that many people in your life in which you can actually say, he/she changed my life for the better.

Maynard Navalta. Son, Brother, Husband, and Father to 3 girls. Died last night in a Motorcyle accident on his way home from work. He retired from the Military not to long ago and was only in his late 20s. He was the eldest out of 7 kids and was a very responsible individual. Just to think someone that you've seen and grown up with throughout your childhood is now dead and gone. It takes someone to pass away, to realize that life is too short to waste time. You will be greatly missed.

This winter break has seemed unbelievably long. Starting tomorrow Spring semester begins, and I surely can't wait to see where it takes me. Lets hope for the best.

cheer-up buttercup

Good people don't deserve to get hurt. No one deserves to get hurt both good or bad. It just happens. A lot of people in our lives tend to go through the same experiences we go through, in every different way or form. So you would most likely in any situation take the time to handover advice to those who are in need of it. But have you ever stopped to take your own advice for a change. Story is today, for once I clearly heard myself and it was nice to be able to take it and use it for my own life. All I need now is the time and confidence haha.

I Love my Sisters :)


Diva1 - by kaylakayyy on Polyvore.com

I like this look because it has that sophisticated-ness to it. I know I will never be able to afford that purse but everything else seems easy to reach :)

i can say...

I'm better today, than I have been in the past few days. and I know it is going to take a really long time for me to get over all this. but I just wished I had some closure or understanding to why things have to end this way, or questions as to why it has to even end at all. Friendships are one thing that I treasure most. You win some, you lose some. but no matter what there are those who remain there through the battle. So here I am waiting in vain..

Two-thousand-nine you barely started and I've had to go through all this? already? couldn't you have given me some slack, or some genuine happiness for once. I've grown stronger in the past few months then I have been in the last year. I'll be ok, because everything is ok.

There are moments in our lives when we find ourselves at a crossroad, afraid, confused, without a roadmap. The choices we make in those moments can define the rest of our days. Of course when faced with the unknown, most of us prefer to turn around and go back. But once in a while people push on to something better. Something found just beyond the pain of doing it alone and just beyond the bravery and courage it takes to let someone in. Or to give someone a second chance. Something beyond the quite persistence of a dream.

Happy Birthday Mother!

...I love you more than anything in the world, even if you can't read this :)

Polyvore try #2 :)

Boho1 - by kaylakayyy on Polyvore.com

I really like this look because it combines both casual and comfort. I think back and laugh at how I used to think shoes like those were ugly but, I've grown to like them ever since I once tried them on at Aldo. Soon enough my outfits i try to put together will look better.

Its about 4:23 in the morning. My big and lil came over. We played tennis, came back to my house, ate dinner, baked brownies, ate a lot. big left around 1am and lil didn't leave til about 3ish. I am not as tired as I should be but I could sleep if I tried. Funny thing is that my sister is already waking up to go to work soon. because it is now 4:50am. ok I think it is a sign to go to bed now.

Today:
sleep
work (on-call) 5pm-9pm
birthday dinner for mother.

something new

at the beginning of every semester. I try and find something that I can be more attentive to besides the regular school, friends, family, and boy issues... So my sister (BeautyIsOnly) is such a fasionista, that I have decided to somewhat join in on the fun. Although I never said it's any good, but the job will do. I wanted to start of with this whole polyvore site in which you are able to take different pieces of clothing, accessories, etc. to make up a whole new ensemble.
Here's my two cents:

Polka-dot chic by kaylakayyy
The reason I chose the dress, is because it had a lot of colors to it, so that it was easier to mix and match with different accessories. I used red as the color of choice as you can see in the bag, and the bottom of the black pumps. I also think that the black leather jacket added some attitude to the look :)
It may suck, but hey it'll get better in the process, Just you wait.